Disclaimer: I am not writing this and posting it here to in any way embarrass, humiliate, or make you think less of my daughter (or myself as a parent). I'm merely writing it down so we remember it all correctly years from now when we share the story at her wedding.
We had some wonderful Cedar Falls friends visit us last weekend. They made the trip with their three boys just to hang out with us and we enjoyed every minute of it. I had a sent a few suggestions of things to do while they were here and the one thing Lauren mentioned had to be done was eat at the Cheesecake Factory. Other than that they were just happy to see us. Awww.
So Cheesecake Factory it was and once they got here we decided to do it for supper that night so we wouldn't run out of time a different day and miss the opportunity. I knew getting there on a Friday night would be tricky but we "checked" on the traffic and it was reported to be moving at normal speeds that direction. We should have been able to get there in 32 minutes. Lauren hopped in my car and Kurt rode with Jim and the boys and we were off. About 10 minutes later we were stopped dead on the interstate.
And about 10 minutes after that Myka said she had to go potty.
I told her to hold it and quietly looked around for options. We were in the middle lane of traffic, so no "hopping" out to the side of the road. I saw a sand bucket, but it was pretty shallow. There was also still an empty sippy cup from the afternoon. It had a lid, and was "disposable". I waited, and watched in the mirror. I saw the "potty wiggle" two more times before she said, "Mommy, I REALLY have to go!"
"OK. Unbuckle. Stand up."
With a maneuver only a mom of preschoolers could complete I kept one hand on the wheel, my eyes on the road, and successfully held the sippy cup for her to empty herself into while she balanced herself in the backseat. And in the quietness of all the concentration going on, I hear a fairly quiet and innocent giggle amongst the trickle, "hee hee he hee."
It
was funny. And new. And something she had never done before and knew was not something she was supposed to do. And that giggle should have served as a warning.
But I was just happy it all went into the cup. She happily hopped back into her seat, buckled up, and we continued on our way. The cup and it's contents were properly disposed of and the matter was over. Yeah, right.
Since it took us over an hour to get to the Cheesecake Factory, and it was a Friday night, and they don't take reservations, and it was National Cheesecake Day (who knew?), our wait was almost 2 hours. And it was 6:00. We knew the kids would never make it that long so we abandoned the dream and ate at a much less busy (and more kid friendly) restaurant nearby before heading back home. Since it was already an hour past everyone's bedtime we were rushing around to get everyone settled in for the night. I had asked Myka to go brush her teeth while I finished getting the bed set up for the boys. When I was done I went to check on her so she could get out of the way for everyone else.
And there was Myka. Sitting on the garbage can, about 6 inches from the toilet. Peeing.
And I think I may have heard a little giggle...
I am happy to report I did not over react. I do know her well enough to know that freaking out about this would have only turned it into a challenge. We calmly discussed why that was not appropriate and again went over the fact that we only did that in the car because we did not have any other options. And I calmly pointed out that since she was actually IN a bathroom, with one hand
on the toilet itself to steady her while she leaned on the garbage can, she did indeed have another option. Well, calmly, and probably sarcastically. But really??
Anyway, I thought it was over at that point. We all had a good laugh after the kids were in bed and the trash can was properly bleached and ready for normal usage. We woke up the next day and hung around the house while Kurt worked a few hours at church. The plan was to head out as soon as he got home with a picnic lunch for a trip to the zoo. The kids played well for the most part with Myka getting a couple time outs which tends to happen more when the excitement level goes up with kids visiting and especially in combination with a late bed time the night before. But we were all ready when Kurt got home and we all hopped in the same vehicle as the night before to head to the zoo. I tried to make Myka go potty twice before we left but she insisted she had nothing to give. Weird, but whatever.
Traffic was great and we made it to the zoo in record time. No potty in cups and no starving, misbehaving children. At some point on the ride, Myka brought up the fact that she had "peed in three garbage cans." Lauren and I looked at one another questioningly and I mentioned to Myka that she had, indeed, peed in ONE garbage can, but she wouldn't have done that again because we talked about why we don't do that just last night. I don't know why she said three but I honestly thought she had just misspoke. Lauren, who knew Myka and her antics fairly well as she went through the terrible twos, and threes, and fours, was pretty sure we had just heard a confession. Lauren is very wise.
After a wonderful day at the zoo, we got home and decided to send the kids out to the backyard pool while we grilled and got ready for dinner. Myka and I were getting her swim suit on in our bathroom when I looked down and noticed our garbage can had some liquid in the bottom. I had to think back to how I had cleaned up the previous night's mess to make sure I hadn't dumped something in this can, but I was sure I hadn't. I slowly looked up at Myka and asked her what was in the can. "I peed in it." "Why? When?" "When I had my time out. I was afraid you would get mad if you heard me going in the toilet."
That, in itself, is a quote I will remember for a long, long time.
And then, "I told you I peed in three garbage cans..."
And since I was looking at two of them, I was pretty sure where the last one was. I headed down to the main floor bathroom and sure enough, there was number three. And just like the other two, it was six inches from a toilet when it was being used as one.
Now I'm sure you are all thinking, "well, that's a funny story. I'm sure Molly made sure Myka knew NOT to do that again and all potty was hence forth deposited in the proper receptacle." (because I know you all talk like that...)
But no. That's not the end. Because, see, that would require our head strong, creative, inquisitive five year old to go against all of her natural instincts and give up the investigation she had started before it was complete. Which brings us to Sunday. When, after a morning of church and eating out together while relaxing at our house before our friends had to head home, I looked out the back door to see Myka, with her pants around her knees, sitting in one of our outdoor chairs, peeing.
And, even though the door was closed, I
KNOW I heard a little giggle.
That was it. This time I flipped out, which included a timeout in our bathroom until our friends left. And I didn't mind she was there with all three bathroom garbage cans, because at least I knew she didn't have to potty anymore.
So in a matter of 48 hours, Myka managed to pee in something other than a toilet five times. Pretty impressive. And because I try to look at the positive side of things, here are some high points of this weekend's adventure:
1.We're glad we could give our visitors a good Myka story to take home, because we know they have had a five month drought.
2. All three of my bathroom garbage cans are cleaner than they have ever been.
3. I have had a refresher course in cleaning up potty from various places just in time to start potty training Eli.
4. I found out my daughter is equipped with a giggle alarm. I will heed it's warning from now on.
5. Someday, this story will be very funny to us and very embarrassing to her. And you can bet we will tell it again, and again, and again.
Which almost always leads to something like this:
But Summer decided to take a break for a week and we had a wonderful 5 days of cooler temps, air conditioned-free living, walks, bike rides, zoo trips, and other events that don't involve soaking one's chin unnecessarily.
